IN THOSE EYES

It is all new to me, serving the Homeless at a weekly breakfast downtown in Baton Rouge. I have always had the heart to serve, but had no connection, and was much too timid to appear there alone. I served with one of my Connect Groups as a pre-Servolution effort to relieve the Cooking for Christ group that cooks faithfully every week. It was such a blessing that morning, I decided since I work nights as a Caregiver for an Alzheimer patient and am able to get some sleep, I could serve weekly, then go home afterwards.

This past Thursday, I went to Roselawn Dream Center after work, and put my gloves on to help serve at the breakfast. There is something about teamwork that really appeals to me, so I was in my element serving eggs on the line with two others. I found I was rarely looking up as I worked at first, concentrating on my job. I noticed others who are regulars had big smiles, warm hugs and were on a first name basis as they saw the people come in. I found that so engaging. I found it inspiring. I’m a rookie on the scene, and would need to spend time in that environment to develop those kind of relationships, I reasoned within myself… then, I saw those eyes.

They appeared sad. They looked tired. I got the feeling as I looked into them, that they had been hurt over and over again in his lifetime. Those eyes had served as windows of the soul to that man. I got the sense that he was embarrassed and ashamed to be in that position, needing someone to feed him. I found compassion stir in my heart for him. I was scooping eggs over and over again, but I was there as a representative of Jesus to serve him. I looked back into his eyes and smiled. Those tired eyes crinkled at the corners and softened as he responded.

I realized I have had those eyes at times in my lifetime as well. Fortunately I have not had the circumstances he has had, however, in recent months, I have had three times I was out of work and really scared over my financial situation. Last summer I had double hand surgeries and was out of work for two months. It was tough then, but one of my sons sent money regularly during that time. I returned to work only to be laid off a month later. When I have work, the money goes priority-wise to basic bills which has kept me behind overall, but has kept my head above water.

I have had security in my life and I have had real scares. It has been a test of my trust in the Lord during these times. At Christmas, a family at Healing Place Church anonymously gave me a monetary gift which was so incredibly generous, and which God used deeply in my life to enable me, in faith to trust that He is my Provider and sees my need. I am still struggling, and what I saw last Thursday, is that I am two steps away from being homeless myself. Reality hits hard sometimes and causes us to evaluate truthfully our true position of need. I see that I am no different than that man who was hurting…I’m just still able to be independent. God forbid I think I am any better and have had a better, more wonderful life. It is all His grace.

I want to continue serving weekly, Lord Willing, and I hope I will never lose sight of what the Lord showed me through those eyes. Truly, Christ has compassion on our souls and enables us to love others...that is if we allow ourselves to see others with His Eyes.

Colleen Morgan-Hobbs